… this was one of those moments:
“We cannot purify our own desires. So don’t fall into the trap of taking this on as a spiritual self-improvement project. Instead, lift yourself to God in the midst of your disordered state and allow God to undertake the necessary transformation.
Only prayer can order a disordered inner life. While this may seem overly simplistic and possibly over spiritual, it is absolutely true.
Prayer sorts out our desires. Notice that I did not say that in prayer we are able to sort out our desires. No. The sorting work is God’s, not ours. Our job is to sit in God’s presence and allow God to purify our desires. IF this does not seem practical enough, you have not spent enough time sitting in silence in God’s presence. Words may be coming between you and God.
Silence in the presence of God belongs to the core of prayer. It deepens our awareness of both ourselves and God. For it is in the stillness of silent prayer that we learn what our own desires most truly are. It is here that God reveals us to ourselves. “Examine me and know my heart, probe me and know my thoughts” (Psalm 139:23) is not, as it appears, a request that God would know me but that God would show that known self to me. And where God does this most dependably is in silent prayer where we center ourselves in God.
Prayer is the place of divine transformation because it is the place in which our hearts our slowly transformed into the heart of God. Prayer is the place where we discover that our deepest desire is nothing other than God alone. This is the purification of desire.”
– David Benner, Desiring God’s Will (pp 87)